How to tell your parents about a bad grade in your diary. Eternal C grade: how to help a child

I got a quarter of two marks, although I was always good .. I don’t know how to behave .. I’m in shock, and I’m very afraid to tell my parents that they will swear a lot and even beat .. Is suicide a way out?
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Fallen Angel. , age: 15 / 20.03.2014

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Dear angel, first of all, you are not fallen! And why worry so much about some triplets, now it seems to you that study is the most important thing, but believe me: there are more important problems, compared to which these triplets are real nonsense. Many people generally have only Cs in a quarter in all subjects, and they are glad that even if they are not Cs, they should not take an example from them, I am sure: you are a diligent and smart girl, so you will fix everything in the next quarter. Tell your parents that in the next quarter you will study more and will definitely get 4 a year. And set this goal for yourself! Advice on how to get good grades: learn something in advance at home (a theorem, paragraph, verse, etc.) and raise your hand (teachers usually ask who wants to answer), take reports and messages (they usually give only five ), go to add. classes in lagging subjects (if you have any in your school). Then you will have several 4 and 5 in the magazine, if you get 3 or 2 for independent, etc., then in the end the annual in the quarter will be 4 and the annual 4, if in the other quarters, except for one, there are 4. Good luck !!! And do not try to do stupid things because of school nonsense! All the best awaits you in life! Many people write that life began only after school, so you cannot deprive yourself of the opportunity to see the world and a lot of interesting and beautiful things in the future!

Julia, age: 03/26/2014

Pretty Girl!

Let me tell you a big secret: school grades in real life do not mean ANYTHING. True true. Losers become businessmen, and excellent students work for a penny - and this happens all the time. It is important for your parents that you study well - ok, try to study well. But don't be upset about a few triplets. When they start swearing, don't make excuses. Listen silently. Ask for forgiveness. Be patient, buddy. You will still be wonderful in your life, honestly !!!

Kind regards!

Ekaterina, age: 03/20/2014

Suicide is by no means an option! Got threes - work on mistakes! They wrote correctly, a lot of poor and C grades took place in life, try, learn, work with teachers. You will be good again next quarter!
Help of God! and courage when explaining to your parents!

Elena, age: 36 / 03/20/2014

Talk in advance with the parent who is more able to understand you. Threes are not the end of the world. Everything can be corrected. The subjects have become more complex now, perhaps you just need help, classes with a tutor in some subjects. You do what you can. But there may be factors that you are not able to influence. And here the help of parents is necessary. Refer to your classmates. Ask them, mainly in these subjects, what are their grades? Now, what is happening in schools is the following: textbooks have been changed in some subjects. Textbooks can be extremely unsuccessful, experts say. My child is in the 7th grade. The physics textbook is composed in such a way that children cannot figure out how to solve problems on their own. Most of the class goes to extra classes. Also an extremely unfortunate textbook on the Russian language. Most of the tasks have to be done using the Internet. I don't know, maybe you have other Russian textbooks. Talk to your mom about it. This is not your fault. I just need help and tutorials, where the material is explained in a more accessible and sensible way. There is no need to be afraid of anything. You figure it out, work out on vacation, and fix it all. There are no unsolvable problems. Well, and, in the end, if the triples are honest, if you did not write off, then the triple is also an estimate. It is not always possible to study equally well in all subjects. In any case, this is not a reason to give up. I had one professor friend who said: I know more than any academician. Because I have knowledge from different areas at least for the top three. It is impossible to be an excellent student in everything. This is totally normal. The main thing is that you have an idea about some branches of knowledge, and this is already good.

Olya, age: 42 / 03/21/2014

Listen, triples only matter while you are in school, as you said above - in life, grades do not decide, that's for sure. Have a really heart-to-heart talk with the gentler parent. I would do that. Whatever it is - be patient, handle it. Do not be afraid. Suicide is not an option at all, you haven’t even lived yet - you haven’t seen the beauty of the mountains, you haven’t seen the opposite guy’s eyes in love, you haven’t seen your children, you haven’t lived just yet - you haven’t enjoyed the beauty and miracle of Life. There are dark, even black stripes. Just be patient. think that it will pass, that it will not be forever. Everything will be fine, hold on and don't give up!

Maria, age: 03/24/2014

Sometimes your parents may seem like your enemies, but in reality they are yours. best friends... If you are afraid to tell them about a bad grade, then remember that they will be upset or angry only at a short time and just because they care about you and want you to have good academic performance... Telling your parents about the bad grade honestly will mitigate the consequences of the conversation.

Steps

Part 1

Review your report card. By looking at the report card, you can determine in which subjects you are doing excellently. In addition, you can see which items need to be pulled up. If you do not understand something or you disagree with something, talk to the teacher. You will need to talk to your parents about your grades, so you yourself need to understand what's what.

Think about why you are getting bad grades. Write down all the possible reasons you received poor grades lately. The first thing your parents will want to know is the reasons why you got poor grades. Be prepared to explain these reasons to them. Do not lie. Below you will find possible reasons for poor academic performance:

Talk to your teacher. If you know you will have a low grade in a quarter or semester, talk to your teacher about how you can correct your grade. Be honest with your teacher about the reasons for your poor performance.

• Ask if you can get an additional grade by completing an assignment.
• Find out the teacher's opinion on your progress. Teachers have a lot of experience working with students who are lagging behind, and they can give you reasons for your poor performance that you never knew existed.
• Ask for advice on how best to study and absorb the subject matter.

1. Make a progress plan. Use all the information you get from going through your report card yourself, as well as the teacher's advice. Thanks to this, your academic performance will improve significantly in the next semester. Show your plan as you talk to your parents. By doing this, you show that you acknowledge the mistakes you made and are ready to take action to correct them. Parents will see that you are acting like an adult who sees your mistakes and is willing to do whatever it takes to correct them. This will make parents more likely to believe your promise to improve their academic performance. Here are some things you can do to improve your grades:

   Make up your daily routine. Everyone is different, so it’s important to have a schedule that’s comfortable for you to follow. Write a timetable that includes space for homework and rest. You can start doing your homework right away after school, or you can take a couple of hours of rest and then do your homework. Choose the one that suits you.

   • Start your homework at the same time every day. If you learn to follow the established schedule, your academic performance will improve dramatically.

2. Set realistic goals for yourself. Think about why good grades are important to you. What do you want to do in the future? Many students want to receive additional education and get a job on Good work... Have you already decided where you will study after graduation? If you already know who you want to become, you can focus on studying the subjects that you will need to know in the future. Find out what the requirements are for applying to educational institution... In addition, find out what grade point average is considered the most preferable for admission.

   Part 2

   Talking to parents

   1. Don't try to hide your report card from your parents. While you may be tempted to do so, resist the temptation. If you try to withhold grades from your parents, you will show your immaturity. However, if you are willing to honestly tell them about your achievements and failures, you will prove yourself as a responsible person. In addition, if your parents find out that you were trying to hide the truth from them, they can get very angry, which is unlikely to please you.

      Talk to both parents at the same time. Even if you have a trusting relationship with one of the parents, it is worth talking to both dad and mom right away. This will show that you are ready to admit your mistakes and discuss them with your parents. This will help you earn the respect of your parents.

      • Tell your parents that you have poor grades before showing your diary or report card. It is better to hear bad news than to see it on paper. The parents' reaction will be less harsh.

   2. Explain the reasons for your poor performance. Parents need to know why you think you got poor grades. This will show that you are open to dialogue with your parents. Tell us about your strengths and weaknesses. Show your list of reasons and discuss it with your parents. Be honest with your parents.

      Show your parents your plan of action to correct bad grades. Tell your parents what you are planning to do to improve your academic performance. Explain to them each of your actions and why it should bring results. Show your plan in writing so that parents can see what you are willing to do to improve your grades. Ask your parents for advice on other activities to add to this list.

      Find out what grades your parents think are bad. You need to be clear about which parent's grades are bad and which are good. This will help you know what they expect from you.

      Focus on the positive. When talking with parents, mention the positive aspects of the report card. Even if your report card is not only good grades, pay attention of parents to positive side your progress. This is sometimes difficult, but try to focus on your accomplishments. You can draw their attention to good behavior or impeccable school attendance.

      • Pay attention to even minor improvements to your parents. Did you manage to improve your grade in any subject? Have you maintained a satisfactory level in the exact sciences for a long time?
      • Don't let bad grades overshadow your hard work. There are certainly good grades on your report card that parents should pay close attention to. Also think about bad grades. Parents don't like your history grade? What was your grade in this subject last year? You may have improved your grades this year. If so, tell your parents about it. Also, promise them that you will do whatever you can to improve their academic performance!

   3. Don't think that your parents will be very angry with you. Your parents were also children, so they are unlikely to be too harsh. Parents are likely to remember that they received poor grades, so if this is your first time, ask them to be understanding. Remember, speaking to them calmly will cause less resentment and show your best side.

      • Be polite and respectful even when you are upset. Your parents are more likely to get angry when they hear about your bad grade, but don't let yourself get angry in return.
      • Be prepared to accept punishment from your parents.

   4. Be optimistic. Bad grades are not the end of the world. Moreover, you can improve your grades. Plus, you already have a plan for solving this problem! Promise your parents and yourself that you will do your best to follow your plan. Your academic performance should be very important to you.

      • Do not give up! Even if you are very upset, do not give up. Don't tell your parents, “I can't improve my grades! I am a loser! I am stupid! It's impossible!" It is unlikely that with such a mindset you will be able to maintain a positive attitude. If your goal seems unattainable, try breaking it down into smaller ones. Tell yourself, "I will try to write my test well and improve my grade by at least one point." Achieving these small goals will help you improve your academic performance.

   5. Ask the parents to talk to other parents or your teacher. You may be thinking that the teacher is the reason for your poor performance. Be honest. Don't blame the teacher without good reason. This will only make the situation worse. However, if you know that other students also have a poor understanding of this subject or the teacher does not prepare you for independent and control work in this subject, inform your parents about it.

   6. Ask your parents to help you improve your grades. Tell them honestly that you find it difficult to stick to your daily schedule. Ask your parents to control you. Promise your parents that you will not become resentful if they follow up on your plan. In addition, parents can help you in the following ways:

      • Parents can explain difficult material to you in simple words. Sometimes teachers and textbooks present a subject in a way that is difficult to understand. Your parents know you better, so they can explain the material to you more clearly.
      • Parents can help you make memory cards.
      • Parents can ask you questions about what they have learned.
      • Parents can check your homework and fix bugs.
      • Parents can give you Additional tasks(outside of school) so you can practice more and understand the material better.
      • You need to understand that your parents are busy people and they cannot devote a lot of time to your homework. Therefore, be grateful to your parents for any help they give you.

   7. Ask your parents to hire a tutor. A tutor can help you improve your academic performance. Keep in mind, however, that tutoring is usually expensive. Don't be discouraged if your parents fail to fulfill your request.

      • The tutor might be a classmate of yours who is well versed in a subject for which you have poor grades. This way you get the help you need and your parents don't have to spend a lot of money on a tutor.

   8. Tell your parents about your current grades. If you honestly share your grades with your parents, they won't be surprised. low scores in the report card. Show them your independent and test papers. Ask your parents to review your homework over the weekend. This will allow them to track your progress.

      • By completing all your homework on time, it will be easier for you to identify what is not clear to you. If you get a bad rating on test work, discuss with your parents what the root of the problem is and how you can correct the negative assessment. This will help you cope with any difficulties you face at school.
   • If a parent understands you better, talk to him first. Then talk to both parents at the same time.
   • If your parents are upset, stay calm. Don't get into a fight. This will only worsen the situation.
   • Talk to your parents in a reasonable manner and listen to them. They just want you to be fine.
   • Let off steam. Hit a pillow, ride a bike, play a computer game, or listen to music. Avoid fights with your parents.
   • Be prepared to accept reasonable punishment. This will show that you are serious about the situation and that this will not happen again.
   • Remember, your parents will always love you for who you are, even if you get a bad grade!
   • Tell your parents that school is difficult and that their support and help can help you improve your academic performance.
   • Draw their attention to the positives. Promise to fix bad grades.
   • Show your report card to your parents. Your parents will get even more angry if you try to hide your true grades. Therefore, you shouldn't fake your ratings. Let your parents know what you are going to do to improve your grades.
   • Don't say, "My classmates are constantly talking and distracting me." This will show that you are trying to evade responsibility. Be honest and ready to be held accountable for your wrong actions.
   • Prepare for the worst case scenario, but at the same time, maintain a positive attitude.
   • Some parents expect a lot from their children. Ask your parents for help if something is not clear to you. They will most likely be willing to help you.

Photo: Artem Ustyuzhanin / website

From April 1, the spring call for conscript service... On the eve of the draft, we met with the chairman of the Committee of Soldiers' Mothers of the Sverdlovsk Region Marina Lebedeva. She told why the spring conscription is easier for conscripts than the autumn conscription, is it worth it to parents to send money to conscripts and what to do if the son complains about hazing.

The admissions committee is located in a small one-room apartment in the city center on Lunacharsky Street. During reception hours on Thursdays, there are always many visitors.

- Marina Mitrofanovna, do they address you in Syria? Mothers and wives of those who were sent there?

No, fortunately. Only contractors go there, they deliberately go there. Mature adults. Officers. Conscripts do not have the right to send to another state. Contractors can be sent from the very first days of the contract, they know what they are doing.

- Just now, a young man came to your reception, after the university he wants to conclude a contract right away ...

They won't send him anywhere. Why and who needs him there in Syria ?! They need professionals, officers. What happened 20 years ago, when they wanted to take Chechnya with one regiment, was due to the confusion in the state, in the Ministry of Defense. Now there is no such thing.

People come to you with problems, sometimes with tragedies. You can compare how the army has changed over the years. What we went for before, what we went for now.

If we take a period of twenty years, when we just started working, and now, the difference is enormous. Twenty years ago, parents came to us with one thing: they did not want their children to go to war. First the first Chechen, then the second Chechen. All the techniques and problems were then associated with the wars: wounds, hospitals, obtaining certificates "Participant in hostilities", dead, missing ... Very serious serious cases. Everyone was afraid of being drafted. Not because they did not want to serve, but because there was a great danger of losing their life. Parents did everything possible so that their sons did not end up in the army during that period. Those who could not pay off or could not realize themselves in another area (go to college, to a technical school) went to serve. Those who were not shot ended up in the war.

Photo: Artem Ustyuzhanin / website

- And 10 years ago?

Tensions still lingered. There were already fewer requests for unauthorized abandonment of the unit. But they were. Sometimes, five or seven people came running from one unit. They spent the night on my tables in the Committee of Soldiers' Mothers, because they had nowhere to go. I could not hand over these boys to the commanders until I figured it out. She called and warned the commanders: "I have Ivanov-Petrov, no matter where." So that the commander slept peacefully at night, he did not look for him in the garden plots.

The commanders were also to blame for missing the situation that led to the escape. But it happened that the boys themselves were to blame: they were neither morally nor physically prepared for the army. The same conscripts from the Caucasus fled from the unit, because they were not used to some kind of housework, chores, cleaning the toilet. In their home it was considered a woman's work. Ten years, fifteen years ago, our conscripts fled from Vladikavkaz, from the southern republics. Then there was a problem, when the commanders sold their soldiers into labor slavery, and the guys did not return home to demobilization, but after three or four or five months, until the garage and garden house were completed. Thank God, there is no such thing now. The military prosecutor's office, investigators are working.

-What are they going with now?

There were few complaints about the unauthorized abandonment of a unit due to hazing. But there is. Basically, they flee from Khabarovsk, Ussuriisk, from Sergeevka (Primorsky Territory). Everything is more or less calm in our Central Military District. Contact about contract service. Someone cannot quit, they are not allowed to leave the military unit. Someone, on the contrary, asks for help getting under the contract.

Now there was a young man at the reception, he served in the Caucasus, received a good specialty in the army, a radio operator. He wants to continue serving under the contract. But his education is only nine classes, it is difficult to get a job in his specialty, it would be secondary - 11 classes ... We must study! They apply for some medical questions, if they do not agree with the draft board regarding fitness for service. Until a decision has been made, it is necessary to be in time, to undergo some additional examinations.

Photo: Artem Ustyuzhanin / website

No commander needs a sick boy! Unfortunately, there was no such thing as a doctor who missed a conscript unfit for medical reasons, incurred responsibility. They often ask for help so that they are not sent to serve outside the Sverdlovsk region. There is family circumstances when conscripts have the right to serve close to home: a wife with a child, retired parents. I am grateful to our military commissar of the Central Military District, Igor Evgenievich Lyamin, all our conscripts, who have a wife and a child, serve in the Sverdlovsk region, they do not send anyone far away. It happens that one of the parents has cancer at the 4th stage, the law does not stipulate that such cannot be sent far away. But we help, they meet us halfway.

- Can you help to be drafted into certain types of troops?

They are turning. We help. It happens that boys want to serve with their dogs. Earlier it was possible to go to the border. Now only contract soldiers serve in the border troops. But with your service dogs, you can go to serve in the internal troops, now it is correctly called the troops of the Russian Guard.

- Judging by the number of complaints and appeals, in which troops is it safer to serve?

The parents of those who serve in the National Guard practically do not apply. Apparently, everything is organized there with discipline and order. All problems are solved by themselves. They have no unauthorized abandonment of a unit, they have never had slave labor, and there are few massive epidemics. Nobody complained about extortion of money, hazing, bullying by employees from the Caucasus. They immediately put the conscripts from the Caucasus in their place: they wash the floors and do all the chores. It is also calm (judging by the requests) in missile forces.

Photo: Artem Ustyuzhanin / website

Photo: Artem Ustyuzhanin / website

- And where do they come from with problems most of all?

Artillery, tank units. This is apparently due to their large number. By the way, parents themselves are often to blame. They do not pay attention to the fact that it is necessary to educate character, physical qualities. Conscripts from the same North Caucasus come much stronger physically, there are horizontal bars, football fields in every yard. And here they sit at the computers, come half-blind, with impaired vision, brought up by single mothers without fathers. Mentally, psychologically, they are often not ready.

By the way, the level of those unfit for service in mental illness has increased. And even those who do not have serious mental illness, they are not always trusted with weapons, military psychologists already in the units reveal psychological deviations. It is good that now this is in the military units.

They call on different ... Still, what should parents do if their son calls and complains about hazing, extortion?

Parents need to go to the unit immediately. It doesn't matter if he serves in Khabarovsk, Vladivostok, Moscow or Yekaterinburg. Because you have no spare sons! I remember about ten years ago there was a case: a mother from the village said that she had sold a cow and went to her son in Vladikavkaz. And she did the right thing. The commanders gave the soldier into slavery, they did not let him go home. Now this is not the case, I repeat, let's not frighten the parents.

- And if he asks for money?

Do not send in any way. If he constantly asks for money, perhaps the boy is spoiled, not used to being refused. He may be cunning: mom, they came out on my pea jacket, mom, they came out on ankle boots, they allegedly stole me. And he himself buys a new phone, although in parts only push-buttons are now allowed. Or at a cafe. Extra money is a temptation to drink. I drank, ended up in the commandant's office - I did something drunk, I voluntarily left a part. It happens that they extort. Recently they helped to sort it out, demanded 40 thousand from the guy, the commanders (junior) accused that the combat vehicle broke down through his fault. Well, it is clear that they are lying. The tank stalled - write it off, for which the soldier may be to blame. Here you need to figure it out, you can contact us in the Committee.

- Well, in what reasonable amounts can money still be sent?

They get two thousand every month, that's enough. Send not money, but parcels. Loose candies: lollipops, caramel. To treat others. Send socks, they don't get enough socks. Cigarettes if smoked. You can put money on your phone.

- Do conscripts have the right to refuse vaccinations?

Have. Any soldier has the right to refuse vaccination. He remains a citizen, no one deprives him of his civil rights. Someone does not feel well, someone is acclimatized. And there are principal opponents of vaccinations.

Imagine that everything depends on your decision ... Would you keep the draft or make the army only on a contract basis?

I'm only for contract service. It should be a good, prestigious male job. But the state believes that military service must be preserved.

- Are there any differences between the autumn and spring draft?

Of course. I was glad that my son went to serve in the spring call. Even if the children find themselves in different climatic conditions, it is easier to acclimatize in summer than in autumn. At the beginning of December, epidemics begin in our country: flu, SARS. The hospitals are packed. Therefore, the spring call is easier. And I would very much like parents and children not to be afraid of the service. The army will teach both courage and responsibility. For many, this is an opportunity to get a military profession that will come in handy in civilian life. And someone wants to associate their future with the army. Indeed, when concluding a contract, you can enter military school and become a worthy officer.

The Committee of Soldiers' Mothers is located at: Lunacharsky, 83, office 63, entrance from the courtyard. Reception day: Thursday, from 13 to 19 hours. Telephone +7 (343) 370–33–07. Marina Mitrofanovna Lebedeva's mobile phone: +7 912 676 87 89.

The word "Troechnik" in Russian has a definite and rather capacious meaning. This is not just a child who has received a "three" for something, a mark that is very annoying to many parents. This is practically a stigma and school status, a kind of social assessment of a child, which is easy to obtain, but difficult to change. “What is a triple, neither this nor that,” many parents exclaim irritably, “it would be better if I got two, it would be clear that I simply didn’t learn.” We often associate the mark "three" with dullness and lack of any abilities, which in itself is very traumatic for a child, especially if his threes are a chronic phenomenon.

Of course, this is not as scary as being a poor student and not keeping up with the school curriculum... However, like all minor chronic troubles, constant triplets greatly affect the child's self-esteem and the attitude of the school team towards him.

It seems that he taught, and studied, and was present at all lessons, but in the dictation again 3-4 mistakes, full of shortcomings in the mathematics test, and the text that was repeated all evening was barely told in the lesson.

There may be several reasons for this situation, when a child is not so much unable to keep up with the school curriculum, but to fall short of his own capabilities, there may be several: self-doubt, poor visual memory, inattention, fatigue, difficult relationships with classmates. The reason for the "triplets" may also be banal myopia, which neither the child himself nor his parents suspect about: sitting on the third or fourth school desk, he simply does not see well what is written on the blackboard. Finding and solving all these problems is time consuming. And this must be done. However, it must be understood that the longer the child is in the "C grade" state, the more difficult it will be for him to get out of this state, therefore, measures to solve this problem must be taken immediately. As you know, "the rescue of drowning people is the work of the drowning people themselves" and you yourself can and must help your child, first of all.

Rule 1. "If you chase two hares, you won't catch a single one."

Don't fight Cs in all school subjects at once. Choose either the object that is most significant to you at the moment, or the object that the child will choose for himself. It may be best to start with a subject that you are more familiar with. Start doing it regularly and calmly, not paying attention to failures or the fact that as a result of your studies, there are no visible changes in school grades. Chronic diseases do not heal quickly, and the result will certainly be. Sometimes an improvement in grades in one subject automatically leads to changes in the child's overall performance.

Rule 2. Evaluate the child's work in your own way

Any, even the slightest, success greatly affects self-esteem and is a powerful motivator. But what if the child has a constant "three" at school? Create your own grading scale, for example, not from 1 to 5, as in school, but from 1 to 10. This will allow you to more accurately track changes in the child's work. For example, for dictation again three, but this is on the school scale, but on our home scale, we went up by one point, because errors are no longer five, but four, or they are less serious, in your opinion. If there is no improvement in terms of errors, find it in something else: the work is written neater, cleaner, etc., which means that the mark on our scale is increasing. Thus, you will remove the feeling of complete failure from the child.

Rule 3. Set concrete and realistically achievable goals for your child. The child has a hard time accepting the general wishes of the parents "study well in order to succeed in life." Set specific tasks for him, for example, reduce the number of mistakes in the dictation from four to three, etc. Rejoice with him if it worked out despite the fact that the school grade has not changed. Avoid setting goals that you know to be impossible in the near future, such as writing a five-mark math test.

Rule 4. Teach your child to evaluate their work

Teach your child to adequately evaluate their own work. This is generally a very useful skill in life. Ask him to rate him for his own work. If you think the child has overestimated her, calmly explain to him why you disagree with him. If you do it tactfully, he will agree with you and give himself a different mark. If not, don't scold him: next time he will be more objective. After calmly thinking and putting a mark "three" for himself, the child will then not so painfully perceive it from the teacher at school.

Rule 5. Scold less, praise more

This is perhaps the most famous and at the same time the most difficult wish to fulfill. It's hard to keep cool after parent meeting where every teacher told you: bad, it doesn’t work, didn’t finish my studies, couldn’t, is silent in class, etc.

However, remember: Dale Carnegie wrote about the low effectiveness of direct criticism. Try and find something small about your child's studies to be praised for. Let your school grades do not change, but you and your child have been writing home dictations for a whole week and have never missed it - this is already a reason for joint joy and pride.

Rule 6. Set a "limit" on criticism

It is probably impossible not to scold or criticize the child at all. Therefore, it is very important here to know a certain measure. If you scold for the next C in math, don't notice the C in reading or music. If you scold for a three in Russian, do it once, and not constantly during the day and do not remind about it in the future. If you criticize and scold a child a lot, he will simply stop perceiving your speech (especially for boys) and become insensitive to criticism. The only real result of this will be your frustrated nerves.

Rule 7. Criticize the work, not the performer

It is also a well-known but rarely followed rule. When analyzing the child's work, you need to monitor your language, how and what words you use at the same time. After a little practice, you will learn to use the automatic language “five mistakes were made in the work” instead of “you made five mistakes”, “it was written dirty and illegible” instead of “you wrote dirty and illegible”, etc. The assessment should refer to a specific subject, such as a written history assignment, and not to the child doing it. At the same time, all of the above refers to negative assessments, you can safely address the positive to the child himself, who was able to do something better than last time.

Rule 8. Encourage your child to ask you what he does not understand

It is believed that the ability to ask is the basis of knowledge. It is costly to ask a clear, articulate problem.

Make it a rule to always calmly and without unnecessary words ("how can you not understand this", "I told you a hundred times," assignments. Better you will explain the same thing ten times than he will not ask you once when he needs it. Many parents are so annoyed by the child's silly, as it seems to them, questions or lack of understanding, that he avoids asking them and is left alone with incomprehensible material on the school curriculum.

Many learning difficulties and triplets in primary school associated with the preschool period. The poor development of the child's speech prevents him from reading well, and this, in turn, affects the entire study as a whole. Underdevelopment of fine motor skills leads to problems in writing, drawing and reading. In the first grade, children are not given marks, and when suddenly in the third or fourth grade a child turns out to be a chronic C grade, this is very surprising to some parents.

If your child is not easy to study in first grade, it may be worth not only looking through his current work and hastily correcting mistakes, but paying closer attention to his studies. This will help him not subsequently slide into permanent triplets. As you know, preventing some problems is easier than fixing them later.

DatsoPic 2.0 2009 by Andrey Datso

In elementary school, most children do their academic responsibilities well, and C's are rare. But as soon as the workload begins to increase, the performance of some children drops: in the quarters there are triples.

For some parents, this becomes a signal to grab a belt, refuse a child to watch cartoons, play and walk, and long-awaited gifts. But is it worth doing this, and how can you generally help your child to improve their academic performance?

As a rule, threats and punishments have some effect, but this quickly fades away once the terror ends. At the same time, the relationship between the child and the parents deteriorates, the child lives in constant stress, which by no means adds to his success in school and in life. If you just want to help your child cope with problems in academic performance, you should give up terror and start acting differently. To begin with, you just need to look from the outside at the child's life at the daily routine and the circumstances under which he is engaged.

Maybe his grades crawled down due to the fact that he does not get enough sleep and goes to bed too late? Maybe you indulge in the pleasure of listening to music or watching your favorite TV show at full volume while he does his homework? Or did problems with academic performance begin after some dramatic event in the family after an abrupt change in the situation or circumstances of life? - If you have suspicions of something like this, it is worth first of all to eliminate the obstacles that can interfere with the child's normal exercise, normalize his life, and relieve psychological stress from the change of environment or other circumstances that influenced him, if any. If there was a divorce, there was a death of one of the family members or the appearance of someone new - it is worth discussing this with the child, if necessary, contact a specialist to obtain psychological assistance... If the problem is resolved, the child's academic performance will recover by itself.

In the case when the reason for the decline in academic performance is the situation or the case, as described above, other symptoms are observed - some changes in the child's behavior, his apathy, or, on the contrary, irritability, and all this usually does not go unnoticed. But what to do in a situation if there were no stresses and problems, if the child behaves as usual, and just “slipped into Cs”? - In this case, it makes sense to start working with the child on your own and consult with teachers who teach those subjects in which the child has ceased to be in time. In addition, in this situation it makes sense to think about the need to hire a tutor - especially when it comes to a child who is in middle school or high school, and already clearly understands that he is not a humanities student, or a supporter of the exact sciences. Additional lessons help in such a situation - the tutor will find individual approach and will present the topic in a more detailed and simple way, which will allow the child to understand it better.

First of all, do not swear, but treat this with understanding and sympathy, try to communicate with the child on this topic and find out his opinion. Maybe he himself will tell you exactly what is the reason for his school problems.

Need to be put in order workplace child, if necessary. The student should have his own desk with good lighting, with drawers for textbooks and books.

If there is a suspicion that the student has something wrong with his health, it is worth contacting a pediatrician who will prescribe examinations and express his suspicions, if any.

Poor school performance can be genetically inherited. Remember, maybe you also suffered from similar problems in childhood, or did your second parent have such problems? If yes, then remember also how you managed to overcome these problems - this will be the best help for the child.

There is one more thing worth considering. Schoolchildren have such a peculiarity: their academic performance is most directly related to how his relations with peers are, and how he feels at school in general. as respected fellows, explicit and implicit leaders usually have decent academic performance. It is relationships that form the zeal for learning and the desire to be at their best, and if something happens to a child in this area of ​​life, academic performance can plummet. At the same time, there may also be a tendency to skip lessons, unwillingness to go to school in general. In such a situation, it is necessary to find out with whom the student is friends, how his relations with peers are developing, and if there are problems in this area - help him, either with advice, if they help, or by contacting a specialist - a child psychologist. This situation cannot be ignored, since problems with peers or with one of the teachers can result in hatred of the school as a whole, and then academic performance will collapse in all subjects, and it will be extremely difficult to restore the child's interest in learning even when transferring to another school.

Another reason may be dislike for the teacher of a particular subject or for the subject itself. Often here it comes to the mindset of a child, which was already mentioned above: he is a humanist, a mathematician or a "technician". The banal dislike for the teacher is neutralized through conversations and explanations, and the problems of the mindset are solved by attracting a tutor.

Be that as it may, but for the most part, problems with a child's academic performance are easily solved - if you do not fall into aggression, find out the cause of the failure and help the child solve this problem. Try to feel and understand your son or daughter, build trust, and everything will work out.