I don't see the point in life. I don't see the point in life

In psychology, the phenomenon of the meaninglessness of life is surprisingly rarely in the spotlight, given its prevalence, and is mainly considered in the context of depressive disorders. Something important (be it meaning or the Other, which is synonymous here) was with me, now it is lost, and it is categorically impossible to live with this loss - this is the conditional picture of depression. It is difficult to establish whether the loss of meaning causes depression, or whether the latter is accompanied by a senselessness of the subject's world as a consequence of the fact that everything is bad and nothing of value is left here. But it is difficult not only to meet, but even to imagine a person who actively and cheerfully lives a meaningless life, as well as someone who is sad and ill, but existence is full of meanings. So let's consider that these are, if not equivalent concepts, then firmly connected by the common theme of Melancholia.

But whether we experience it acutely or not, life is fundamentally meaningless, just as everything in the world itself is meaningless by default. It took humanity a lot of time and two world wars to come to this conclusion with all solidity. Not that this achievement pleased anyone, and therefore it remained a dead weight hanging around the neck of culture. The essentially grandiose achievements of existentialism were never assimilated and consolidated (like the entire historical experience of mankind), but now those who suspect that something is wrong with the meaningfulness of the universe can turn to them. However, the meaninglessness of reality and the meaninglessness of the existence of a particular subject are not the same thing.

The meaninglessness of reality means the simple and important fact that reality simply is. This is a heterogeneous mass of somehow ordered or unordered phenomena that happen or do not happen, indifferent to people and to itself. The world is absolutely nothing. The question of meanings is not raised here, because meanings are about intelligent people, and not about stones and stars (no matter how much you like and are filled with value stones and stars). Mortals are thrown into a meaningless world and are trying to figure it out somehow here while they can. Then they generally die, so you have to try harder or spit on everything and go to drink. But let's say we don't want to drink.

This means that the only “place” where, at least hypothetically, meanings can be found is the mental space of the subject himself, and not something outside of it. This does not mean that there is no point anywhere except for self-development (whatever that means) or other games with reflections. This means that my special relationship to this sculpture, forest, city, the idea of ​​libertarianism or the pantheon of the ancient Maya, which endows them with meaning, is not so much in them and not even so much in myself, but between us, where is something there on this basis matches or doesn't match something in me. My love for this person is precisely my love, something special that I perceive in connection with him, and not something in him, but without me and without him this would not have arisen. Sounds like a truism, but a very important truism. Meaning is something that originates in the subject, but is impossible without an object, imaginary or not. The absence of meanings laid out outside and radiating from objects can upset someone, but in reality there is nothing terrible in this. But such a shift in perception allows us to see much better how all these damn important things appear and come to life in ourselves through contact with something outside. So no matter how much you stare at the object of love, you will not find love there. And I remind you that projections are still our projections.

Unfortunately, just as there is no reason to look around the world and look for something meaningful there when your life is empty, so there is no reason to examine your insides with the painful enthusiasm of an augur in search of lost meaning with pictures of a great future and a golden age of the past. . Because everything that appears is born somewhere in between, and it happens, unfortunately, by itself. The only classic of any successful work on the question of meanings, Viktor Frankl, noted that "happiness is like a butterfly ..." and so on, and in general it is hard to find and easy to lose. This quote became fantastically banal and the ashes already formed from it in the process of repeated exploitation managed to crumble into dust, but, unfortunately, the truth remained there, except that it became more difficult to turn to it. Meanings cannot be found or revived by conscious efforts of the will (how to do many other things with their help). Sometimes they suddenly appear, and then it’s better to be more careful with them, because everything beautiful breaks disappointingly easily. Moreover, the more efforts the subject makes to search for meaning and the more he loads this find with value, the less chance he has. Since it is precisely such an overload of the psyche with painful pressure with the seal of guilt and destruction that has already led the subject to a loss of meaning and continues to do the same. As well as a rough and premature analysis of the meaning makes it disappear, and not necessarily because the meaning was “false” (if false meanings exist at all), but because of the same fragility.

By the way, according to eyewitnesses, reading “In Search of Meaning” in the hope of finding the actual meanings there is completely useless, they cannot be found there, and even the search paths are outlined there in a very abstract way. After that, many are disappointed and believe that since the wise Frankl did not help them, then nothing will help - everything is in vain, I am doomed. But just not all books and sages are equally useful. It is more useful for someone to read Frankl, for someone Mamardashvili, someone for Lavey, someone for news, and for someone it is better not to read anything at all, but to go for a walk. There is no general scheme for finding meaning, no matter how much you want to refer to it, because it is very personal, perhaps even the most personal (apart from desires, of course). What can be learned from Frankl's manuscript, suffered in the horrors of imprisonment, is that there is always a meaning and it cannot be absent. This is not something that is destroyed or something that needs to be constructed, it is something that exists somewhere and simply remains invisible and unnoticed for the time being. There is a significant difference between the fact that something you are looking for somewhere (or sometime) already exists, and the fact that it is absent in principle. Finding what is, is much easier than finding what is not.

Such a hope could become a worthy support for the subject in this mystical search, if not for an important reservation. A person in a depressed state, living, accordingly, in a meaningless world, is not only deprived of hope, he in every possible way drives it away from him, not allowing it to take root, also because the fear of disappointment in him is much stronger than the desire to have hope. It is hard to blame him for this after what he has already lost and how much he was disappointed. Nevertheless, hope is an important and, perhaps, a necessary step on the path of search, and his experience of disappointment can become meaningful in itself.

And here we come to what I think is the most important part of this message. Melancholy implies a long process of debilitating destruction, a burden of endless guilt, and the presence of a powerful internal aggressor that blocks the way to change the situation. And much more, coupled with the fact that the meanings are worn out from the subject's inner gaze, and he plunges into the desert of meanings, where the furious winds of self-hatred are blowing. But despite the fact that the whole nature of the subject, under the control of the despotic authority sitting over everything, prevents the transition of the situation and the subject himself into a qualitatively different state, breaking the vicious circle of destruction and guilt, a loophole still remains. Although even that can be difficult, the best way to make sense of it all is to literally make sense of it all. It is obvious that a situation where meanings are lost prevents them from being acquired, but meaninglessness as an idea, and not an experience, may well become the foundation for a growing tree of meanings with a subject hanging on it and fruits in the form of suffering and compassion, devastation, demons tearing the soul and everything in this kind. Yes, this does not sound too optimistic, and someone may not like just such an outcome, but there are things that we do not choose, including our psychostructure. It simply exists, and no matter how bad it may seem, but the struggle with it always ends in senselessness and defeat of the subject, and not in miraculous transformations. The latter, if possible, is due to cooperation with oneself, including with bloody tyrants and demons, and not due to destructive attempts at revolutions and a triumphant war with oneself. Although the latter sounds much more romantic and tempting, it does not end well.

I guess that all these fabrications can help the suffering not as much as we would like. And I understand this, including as someone who was no less tormented by the problem of the loss of meanings. But this is what allows me to say with greater confidence that this is not a hopeless situation. The world is indeed full of objects, interaction with which reveals guiding sparks of meaning. And no matter how active (and in a depressive state, rather passive) search for these sparks among the deposits of inert matter, sooner or later will be crowned with success. It is also extremely useful here to know yourself at least to the extent that you understand what attracts, enlivens and arouses interest (or rather caused this effect before, because now everything is bad and boring).

Of course, for everyone it will be absolutely personal and in this sense unique experiences and objects, as well as ways of interacting with them. But all this really exists in mortals and the accursed world inhabited by them and requires only detection and peering in one form or another. Fortunately, this opportunity is open to everyone, as long as he is alive and thinking. In addition, do not blame yourself and allow others (as well as your internal objects) to reproach for the fact that life is empty and interests are lost. People are responsible for their own meanings, but blaming themselves for their absence is tantamount to blaming an arbitrarily hardworking worker for the absence of a harvest in winter. You can only wait for some events, and in the meantime be more patient with yourself.

Vitaly! I want to tell you so much at once !!)) I was waiting for such a question)). So I wanted to discuss with someone about the meaning of life, so I want to tell someone about what I now know!))

Well! Let's discuss! You are a doctor and you are only 24 - how wonderful! Lost the meaning of life! And that is great! Without losing .. you will not find! At the age of 24, a person should and must think about the meaning of life, if this does not happen ... you can make diagnoses)) Everything is according to plan here))! Childhood and youth are over, adulthood has begun, with responsibility, with problems, with eyes wide open, with the loudspeaker of the crowd - i.e. society. And what do you see in adulthood?! That everyone lies and pretends. What a disgusting thing! All around you are scammers! More recently, I also thought ... And your phrase: "if you are the same person, perfectly aware that there is no happiness!" - would be true if not for the many adventures in my life. The fact is that every person is sent into the world for something. Throughout our lives, we learn, learn, read in other people's eyes, listen to other people's thoughts, touch someone else's body, taste unusual food, etc. Yes Yes exactly! You can correct me: everything is banal - everyone eats eggs in the morning, they say the same thing, they feel the same way as everyone else, they learn the same subjects from year to year. And everything is so banal! Trunks! But! To know who Khobotov is, you should watch the movie "Pokrovsky Gates", in order to understand what and how each person feels, you should learn to listen with all receptors, in order to learn to listen in general, you should learn! When I graduated from the institute, I decided that my experience and knowledge is a storehouse, I "caught God by the beard!", I am the main one!, I understand everything and know everything perfectly! Don't teach me how to live! - that was the motto))) But life began to present surprises and adventures. Fate made me understand life from the other side, from the one with which I had not yet seen it. And the insights began to happen! Of mischief! Yes, this happens to every person, yes, this is not news, yes, it is banal. BUT! Everyone has their own insight! Everyone is interested in their own way. Finding out your true purpose and being able to reveal your potential is not just interesting, difficult and easy, this is the meaning of life! When we learn something new, when we understand that everything in the world is fleeting, directive, that deja vu is our life, that everything repeats itself, that we are all the same, that it's all not interesting! We are starting work! This is the most important work in our minds! In our heart. "The more I know, the less I know" - do you know this phrase of I. Kant? It was a great philosopher who lived as an ascetic - this is my opinion.

After receiving my diploma, I went down the stairs, and our teacher (very respected, smart, wise!) came to meet me. I asked her: "M.N., aren't you tired of your profession, people with the same problems?" She is a doctor of psychological sciences, practices and teaches. And she answered: "But how can it get bored? After all, every person is a new world!" Now I know for sure! The more I know, the less I know! Every new person in my life is a discovery! Every event is for something. Each adventure is a letter that should be learned, studied, drawn conclusions in order to become wiser. Why do I need wisdom? Why do I need all the hardships and events? In order to know for sure that I helped people, that I left behind a grain of kindness, mercy, love. Because it is love that makes a person learn, learn, apply his experience for good and help people who do not know about these truths! And there are a lot of such people! So what is the meaning of life? Everything is written in the Bible very clearly, yes, in any denomination you will find the answer to this question. Any psychologist will tell you that the meaning of life is love and kindness. I wish you as a person of LOVE! I wish you, as a doctor, to achieve perfection and mastery in your field, which means being able to understand the cause of the disease! Knowing the cause, the roots, you will be a doctor. Knowing the symptoms, you are just a doctor ... Develop! This is what makes sense! Get to know the unknown, discover fantasy, for example, the third eye! Here's where to start!

Luule Viilma "Forgive Yourself" - so you will learn the causes and mechanisms of psychosomatics, this book will help you understand and forgive.

Louise Hay will also explain to you the psychosomatics of the disease.

Yoga: I recommend you breathing yoga in the "Art of Life" - all the information on the Internet. Yoga will give you the right ability to relax by nature, proper breathing is the basis of a healthy existence! In a healthy body healthy mind

What's the point?
One evening, a belated traveler knocked on the sage's door. The sage invited him to the house, treated him to a simple dinner, they started talking.
- Listen! - said the guest. - The glory of your wisdom has reached our edges. You know a lot. Can you explain to me why a person lives in this world, what is the meaning of life?
- What do you think about it yourself? - asked the sage.
I have thought about this a lot, but have not found an answer. Every day I do the same thing: I work, eat, sleep, rest… The day turns into night, after which the same day comes again. Weeks, months, years go by. After winter comes summer, then winter again. I find happiness - and again I lose it. Everything revolves in some kind of meaningless circle. It doesn't make any sense to me.
The sage, without saying anything, led the questioner to a large, measuredly ticking clock, and opened the door of the mechanism. Inside there were many wheels that turned - some faster, others slower - meshing with teeth one after another and setting the arrows in motion.
- Look, - the sage broke the silence, - look at this wheel ... or - at this. They keep spinning in the same place. What do you think is the point of spinning one wheel? Good answer 4 bad answer 8

Each person has his own meaning of life. His search is traditionally defined as a spiritual and philosophical problem, the essence of which tends to determine the purpose of the existence of each of us. If you think more globally, then to the destiny of all mankind. It is important. And if life has lost its meaning, then something worse is unlikely to happen.

About the problem

This usually happens during depression. Although most often it is the loss of the meaning of life that causes this condition. During which nothing is wanted. The person is depressed, he does not feel joy, does not show interest in anything, constantly feels tired. His speeches are pessimistic, he does not want and cannot concentrate, sometimes he thinks about death or suicide, he constantly sleeps or does not do it at all. And most importantly - this feeling of worthlessness, accompanied by a feeling of fear, anxiety and even guilt.

Life has lost its meaning ... How much pain in this phrase. And what is this problem about? With the lack of what a person needs most. For some, this is a job and an opportunity to make a dizzying career. For others - a loved one, spending time together, tender feelings and passion. For the rest - a family with a bunch of children. For some, the meaning of life is immeasurable wealth. For others, it is an opportunity to travel and develop. There can be countless examples. But it all comes down to one simple truth. Fortunately. Yes, this is the meaning of life - to be happy. Or, as they say, to be in a state of complete satisfaction with the conditions of their existence and being. That's the meaning of life. This phenomenon, by the way, is actively studied by occultism, theology, psychology and philosophy.

Eternal search

It's a paradox, but many people understand that life has lost its meaning during ... attempts to find it. Such cases are not uncommon. Indeed, people who constantly think about what the meaning of life is are the most unhappy. They are actively trying to know their desires, their own character and themselves. And many are not satisfied with the notorious answer to the eternal question, which assures that the meaning lies in happiness.

And then a person tries to find it in esoteric, philosophical and religious teachings, which, of course, do not give a clear answer to this question. Therefore, a person begins to look for it in music, literature, lyrics and even the natural sciences.

And in the vast majority of cases, disappointment comes to him. He, it seems, has everything that is needed for a fulfilling life - a job, close people, friends, a soulmate, a good salary. But it doesn't make sense anymore. Because the person was convinced: everything is decay. And slowly but surely he loses interest in everything. Begins to experience headaches, struggles with insomnia, experiences chronic fatigue. And it's very hard to live like that. There are attempts to relax. In the best cases, a person is fond of computer games. At worst, he drowns in alcohol and drugs. The worst consequence is suicide. In general, the real depression.

What to do?

If life has lost its meaning, then doing it For the first time, a turning point, so to speak, is permissible. But then you need to act. Either by yourself, or at the suggestion of someone close and indifferent. Many turn to psychologists. Of course, there are effective tips. But there is no universal recommendation that equally helps everyone.

So what to do if you have lost the meaning of life? Start looking for answers. To begin with, it is important to determine what is happening. After all, the essence lies not just in a bad mood, parting with a loved one or accumulated fatigue. The loss of the meaning of life cannot be compared with any sadness.

And we also need to remember that we are all driven by desires. And they need to be satisfied. What could be worse than not having what you want? If you do not satisfy your own spiritual needs, you cannot avoid misfortune. And voids that need to be filled. To begin to gradually get rid of hatred for yourself and your body, others and the world as a whole, you need to remember what a person has always wanted. Let's say, as an example, this is a trip to the sunny Dominican Republic, to the gentle sea. Through force, you need to ignite this desire again. Start planning a trip, collect things, pick up a hotel. There is a saying: "Appetite comes with eating." And in this case, too. The person will be inspired in the process. And the result will be the satisfaction of his main desire, which entails a sense of realization, self-sufficiency and pleasure.

Analysis

Everyone knows that this is a research method in which the object under study is divided into separate parts for better understanding. Analysis is not only related to mathematics, programming and medicine. But also to the topic under discussion. What to do if you have lost the meaning of life? Analyze the current situation.

You need to evaluate your actions and identify mistakes. Nothing just happens. And the reason why a person was on the verge also has roots. But most importantly, in no case should you blame yourself. Everything has already happened. What was, is gone. And now you need to find out why everything happened so, in order not to repeat your mistakes in the future.

It is very important not to feel sorry. This is a bad feeling, once again oppressing a person. He must accept the moment as it is. And even in the most terrible, wild situation, try to find the pros. Even though life goes on. And in the future there is a chance to succeed.

And even if a person has an incredibly hard life, the story of which can bring tears to the most callous person in the universe, there is no need to feel sorry for yourself for a long time. Yes, everything fell apart. Already the bottom, there is nowhere to fall further. Therefore, you need to rise. With difficulty, through pain and torment. It can help to realize that the perception of everything around is just a matter of tuning. Yes, it’s easier to talk than to worry about everything, but the person himself will come to this conclusion when he gets out of a deplorable state.

Release of emotions

If a person is overcome by the question “Why am I living?”, Then it's time to get a beautiful clean notebook with a pen and turn it into a diary. This is a very powerful move. And you can't underestimate him.

“And what should I write in it?” - sluggishly, but with a share of skepticism, a depressed person will ask. And the answer is simple - everything. Absolutely anything. Thoughts can begin with any phrases and expressions - there is no need to structure and organize them, because this is not an essay. A diary is a way to express your emotions. As a rule, a person who constantly asks the question “Why do I live?” Does not want to make contact with anyone. And emotions accumulate. So it is better to reflect them on paper. Over time, this will become a habit. And then a person will notice that in the head, as well as on paper, there is no longer such a confusion that was observed at the very beginning.

And then in the diary you can begin to mark the results of your work on yourself. Does anyone interfere with sketching a small plan for the future?

By the way, when you feel better, you need to find something to your liking. No wonder they say that a person is alive as long as he is interested in living. You need to find a hobby that would not only bring pleasure, but also inspire at least minimal optimism and joy. Maybe start breeding parrots? This will be a great idea, because everyone knows that our smaller brothers give boundless positive, joy and help to pass life's trials. After all, they love their master infinitely. And love gives us strength.

For whom do you need to live?

People, having fallen into impotence and tired of looking for the reasons why they were on the verge, begin to ask this question. Look for the cause from the outside, so to speak. Some, through force, begin to live for a loved one, parents, beloved pet or children. Maybe it helps. But the key phrase here is "through force." Because the problem that touched a person directly and in the most direct way remains unresolved.

You need to live for yourself. Selfish? Not at all. And even if it is, there is nothing wrong with healthy, productive selfishness. You need to stop thinking about what you can do for others. And finally, put yourself first.

By the way, this is often the reason. That man has never lived for himself. He did what was customary. Did what needed to be done. I tried to meet the expectations of my parents or boss. I tried to comply with generally accepted standards, so that "everything is like with people." Although deep down I wanted something completely different. And the realization of this usually comes at the moment when he is standing on the edge. But there is no need to despair. We must remember - there is enough time for everything that you really want to do. This is true. Because desires always subjugate time. And there is no need to wait - you need to start implementing them immediately. And then questions about why life has lost its meaning will fade into the background.

Forget about everything

This is another effective method. He is able to help. Anyone - be it a man drowning in depression, or a woman who has lost her meaning in life. The advice of a psychologist is as follows: you need to sweep away the past from yourself. Forget him. Throw out of memory forever. The past often pulls a person down, like a stone to the bottom of a river, tied to the foot of a drowned man.

All bridges must be burned. Break contact with unpleasant people with whom the person was forced to communicate. Quit a job you hate. Boss oppressed? So you can finally express to his eyes everything that has accumulated in the soul. Divorce a legitimate “soulmate”, with whom there is no longer any chance of establishing a life. Move from a boring and hated city to another place. In general, we are talking about the beginning of a truly new life. The one that everyone loves to talk about today.

And here is the most important thing: with the performance of each action, a person must pass through himself the realization that he is becoming a new personality. Not who he was. You can even fix it with visualization - change your appearance (haircut, hair color and contact lenses, image, tan, etc.). All this may be taken lightly by some. But, again, it seems so only from the outside. After doing all of the above, a person will look around, look at himself in the mirror, and understand that he is already different. And he has no right to return to his old life.

Break

When thoughts like “What am I doing?” begin to appear in a person’s head? and "What am I doing with my life?", it's time to pause. Preferably a long one. In order not to completely wallow in despondency and not fall into a real depression, you need to urgently take a vacation, rent a house by the lake or in the forest and go there. A sharp change of scenery and unity with nature saved a considerable number of people.

What after? Then you will need to give yourself answers to the notorious questions “What do I do?” and “What am I doing with my life?”. Recognize what is causing the discomfort. Why is there discontent and when these questions, in fact, appeared. And then - to find a solution to the problems. Maybe find a new meaning to life. As a rule, people who take a break in time and deal with the oppression that has begun to accumulate do not reach the edge and do not fall into a deep depression.

By the way, a break is not complete without planning for the near future and setting goals. They, like the meaning of life, should be in every normal person who wants to be an accomplished person. Goals do not have to be global (buy a villa in Spain, change from Lada to Mercedes, go into investment business, etc.). They must be viable. And those for which I would like to wake up in the morning. It is desirable that the goals are long-term. Three is enough. It is better to write them down in the notorious diary. It might look like this: “Goal #1: Save up for a year to spend in Greece. #2: Do a 5-minute exercise every morning. No. 3: bring English up to a conversational level. Goals should motivate and set you up for positive life changes. This is the main principle of their setting.

Help your neighbor

It is not easy for a person who is on the edge. But the depressive state that he experiences also affects people close to him, who begin to think: who has lost the meaning of life?

That's a very difficult question. There is no universal answer. It all depends on individual psychological characteristics. What helps one may not help another.

One thing can be said with certainty. The one who knows him well has a chance to help a person. A person who is well acquainted with the specific features of his loved one can roughly guess what actions should be taken to make it easier for him. The main thing is to avoid standards that usually show nothing but indifference, even if the person really wanted to help. These are phrases such as “Everything will be fine”, “Don’t worry, life will get better”, “Just forget it!” etc. They must be forgotten. A person faces a problem: the meaning of life is lost, No “Just forget it!” there can be no talk.

So, you can quietly turn on his favorite music or series, bring food and drinks he adores, start talking about the most interesting topic for him. Little things? Perhaps, but at least a little, they will help restore a person's taste for life.

Methodology of the last day of life

This is the last thing I would like to talk about. When a person is depressed and no longer sees the point in his existence, it does not hurt him to think: what if this day of life was the last? The thought of the imminent disappearance of all reality will invigorate everyone. Of course, when a person is alive and well, he has enough time for depression, sadness and discouragement. Sounds exaggerated, but it's true. But as soon as he thinks about the fact that he has only 24 hours left, everything takes on a different meaning, not to mention the fact that there is a rethinking of values.

And when there is no desire to exist, it is worth using this technique. Live this day like it's your last. Perhaps after this, the desire to exist will flare up again.

Losing the meaning of life is the worst thing that can happen. And it would be better if no one went through this. But in any case, the most important thing is to hope for the best in the depths of your soul. And act. After all, as the great American writer Jack London said: "Man is given one life. So why not live it properly?"

There was and still is such a situation. Above have already given good answers with interesting links, but I will try to describe my options:

1. Do not think about the meaning of life and do everything to avoid such thoughts. Most people do this, using for this either some kind of cheap self-deception (convincing themselves that the meaning of their life is in any petty activities that they do) or simply loading themselves with routine affairs so much that for some "deep thoughts" of time and effort does not remain. In this case, it is not even necessary to have a goal, it is enough just to work every day.

In my opinion, this avoidance is the most unprincipled option, although I often resort to it myself, killing time in games / books / anime / films and other distracting activities. The downside is that sooner or later such attempts to escape end up returning to the same point and the same sad state with the same thoughts, and then everything is new.

2. Get hooked on antidepressants. With a consistently elevated mood, thoughts about meaning will not seem like something worth attention + there will be energy to do some business. The main disadvantage of this option is money, other disadvantages are the side effects of the drugs taken. I myself have never tried it.

3. Kill yourself to stop all good and bad. In the end, everyone will die sooner or later, one way or another, and one death will not differ from another in any way, no matter what one does in a miserable 100 years of human life. Just 1 more person ceases to exist. But this option cannot be considered good (except for the situation when everything finally came to a standstill and became complicated by an unbearable life situation, but even in this case there are always reasonable reasons to try other options instead of suicide) or, even more so, considered as advice, otherwise I myself would not delay it take advantage.

4. Being distracted by alcohol and/or other drugs. It's kind of like an enhanced option 1 with the same result, only more unfortunate and exacerbated by the effects of substance use/withdrawal. There was a time when I used this method, but I abandoned it long ago, it is absolutely meaningless in the long run for the purpose of getting rid of the suffering caused by the lack of meaning (unless the prospect of becoming an alcoholic living from bottle to bottle, or a chronic drug addict for whom there is no nothing but a world created by substances, which also weakens and falls apart as tolerance to the drug increases (however, maybe these are not the worst options ... but everything will end badly when the money runs out).

In general, in my personal opinion, only the option with antidepressants can be considered as a final solution in case the meaning cannot be found for a long time (which is most likely a consequence of depression, unless it is the result of previous philosophizing out of curiosity on this topic, like mine, which led to understanding the lack of meaning, which in turn and over time led to depression and all that kind of thing).

In the sense that antidepressants will help you get out of the generated senselessness of emptiness and a closed cycle, they will give you the opportunity and strength to fix something there and change in life, and then how it goes.

Name: Nazar

Good day! I can't decide on my own how to live my life. My life was not very successful, as for me (although I saw people with disabilities, the homeless, the blind, wheelchair users, etc. I feel sorry for them, I understand that they live much worse than me, but still I feel deeply unhappy ). I am only 19 years old, although I believe that the best years of my life have already passed, that it is not the age, and not the time to run, jump, fool around and just enjoy life for real - like children (after all, they no accessories needed). I live with my mother alone, without a father. I study at the university in the 3rd year. Father left us. But ... let's go in order. It all started around the age of 13. When a boy came to our class, to put it mildly, not very, undisciplined, bully, etc. And in general, he began to lead us. I then gave up my position and stepped into the background in the classroom. This boy came from another school where he had older friends and others. I could not oppose anything to him, so I had to quietly and peacefully stumble. He shook the discipline of our class specifically. Even when he left after the 9th, the class still didn't become normal. I didn’t have friends to talk to someone, to tell someone about my problems, to be listened to, in the class I didn’t really communicate with anyone (well, of course, we talked about this and that, but they were so small “everyday” conversations, such as what lesson is next, what we were asked, etc.). At home, in my yard, I rode bikes with the guys, fired from air guns, but that's all we did, and even then 2 times a month. Then I moved out of there, somewhere around the time I entered the 10th grade. The house was private, his condition was not very good, you couldn’t invite anyone, nothing, they just moved, and then my mother moved to a new job, there it was necessary to make repairs in the office and buy equipment, in short, there was no money, as always (even when my parents they gave a couple of hryvnias for buns in the school cafeteria, I saved this money, because I saw that we didn’t have much of them, and we lived somehow modestly, I saw how hard my parents try, but it’s hard). Having moved to a new place, I did not find new friends here, I stopped communicating with the old ones, since they had already grown up and many had also moved, and I didn’t have time either. The girls weren't welcome either. Only in the 10th grade I dated one for a month, and then we didn’t even kiss (and now I’m 19 years old, and I don’t know how to kiss a girl), and then she left me, and I was very hurt, but no one you won't talk about it. My father cursed at my mother, they shouted, quarreled, I remember even waking up at night, getting up and reconciling; my father disappeared somewhere until the middle of the night, I understood that he did not love my mother, he had another (by the way, he did not love me either, he only shouted, beat, swore. We never spoke with him like a man with a man, he never walked with me, from the age of 9 he stopped working with me at all). And then one day he packed his things and left us. Mom was crying and upset. Well, who cares. The house is quite old, the father did not want to do anything in it, and then he left. And my mother and I were forced to make repairs, as we could not survive the winter normally. We need money for repairs, my mother took out a loan. But basically we did everything with our own hands (both me and mom), with the exception of plastering (you need to be able to do this according to the level and in general, although mom even plastered some small areas herself). I knocked down the walls under a clean one, to a bare stone, we carried out the old heating system (it leaked and there was no winter without it). In general, all this dust, dirt, work until 2 am. We ate only scrambled eggs and potatoes (there was not enough money). Repairs began in the late spring of 2008 and were completed by the middle of spring 2010. And then I also entered the university, I entered a contract (a crazy amount), the group in which I ended up, as luck would have it, was not very good. Everything was very difficult, yes, we have our own team there, we communicate, but we all understand that this is not friendship ... so, just everyday communication. And when I tried to make all of us friends, I realized that no one needs it, everyone is happy with everything anyway. And I’m very lonely, you won’t say anything to anyone, you won’t talk. My father doesn’t call me, doesn’t see me (and I don’t want to be with him, he didn’t help us at all, he just doesn’t give a damn about me). I don't know what to do next. I feel alone. But I really want a friend. But what can I do anyway? I live in a limited way: a department store-university house ... I have no hobbies, I even watch the news on TV. And it’s too late to start living, it’s already over, the end, I haven’t lived yet, but that’s it, it’s time to look for a job soon, to harness the squirrel wheel from morning to evening, that’s it - the best years of life have already passed. I believe that friendship is also some kind of love (everyone I asked, everyone also says so), that without love it will only be a selfish relationship. Don't know. I tried to post here about my life, but what can be conveyed in text? Only a fraction of what is really ... I see no reason to live on. Only my mother keeps me on this earth, how much she invested in me, how much she tried, well, my grandparents (mother's parents). If not for these three people, I would probably have committed suicide (although no, and I couldn’t even do this, because of a moral sense of duty to my mother, to show her that she didn’t raise me in vain). This is the only thing I live for.